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She texts, “Come over, no one is home ;)” Went over, no one was home
Ringtone Goes Off at Funeral Another One Bites the Dust
Sorry for the selfie, I won't blame you for hating on this pic, but…
We have recently become acquainted, and this might seem irrational but here are the numerals by which to contact me. Use them perchance?
The jews practice circumcision because they don’t like to leave tips
Coffee tip… this one really works
Christmas gifts stolen off the back of a truck
I have a good memory But I pretend I do not remember to avoid being considered as a stalker.
Thinking of having a child? Try to raise a dog, if the dog turns out fine, you can raise a child
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